just saw an old couple make out...not too sure how I feel about it. though I will admit at one point I was thinking "oh yeah! get that!"
after we finished he farted and said 'i've been holding that one in'
So i just found out i replied to my room mates craigslist ad. Akward
Mom is telling us about the time she drank her own breast milk. Help.
He played the same pre-sex songs as his brother...
I NEED ANOTHER LEVEL OF CAPS TO EXPRESS TO YOU THE MAGNITUDE OF MY FADDEDNESS
You didn't hold all these dicks to become a party planner!
umm, I just masturbated to old Justin timberlake on MTV jams. in need of dick ASAP
dude, I convinced you I was your conscience for like 15 minutes last night. you weren't just "a little high"
You left your underwear in a sandwich bag on my kitchen counter.
Look, when i woke up this morning, I had every intention of being a responsible twenty-five year old, cleaning up, making my budget, and filing my taxes. Its just I got siderailed by pot and downloading classic Disney songs, because fuck adulthood; everyone loves Disney.
I lick assholes and I wouldn't eat mdma
i do my most serious thinking while screwing her. ive pondered everything from quantum physics to the life cycle of a badger. if i keep this up ill have a phd in no time.
I want to create a human. Discussion later.
I'm sorry for chipping my tooth on your vagina last night :(
Randomize
