is her vagina suppost to smell like dirty taco bell?
Can you believe The 5th Element didn't get best fight scene in 1997?! I'm still bitter. 12 years later.
Haha how do you remember that?
HOW COULD I FORGET?!
Friends don't let friends talk to people who live in Orlando. Sorry I've failed you.
Why am I drunk on a roof painting at 11 in the morning
When she was giving me head last night it felt like there was a NASCAR pit crew working on my dick.
He kept telling me how extraordinarily clean my ears were.
It was like giving head to a cactus.
I thought my dog was a polar bear. I kept asking how the north pole was this time of year.
I just pictured my inhibition personified as little pink piggies with wings flying off into the great wide nowhere hahaha
New war strategy! The ex-girlfriend of my ex-girlfriend is now my twice a week booty call!
I made him cum so hard he couldn't play video games for like an hour. I've never been more proud of myself.
Far be it from me to tell you where you store your dildos but from an interior decorating standpoint not fucking there
wyd
Laying here debating on if i want a sandwich or an orgasm.
I texted her mom a picture of us doing it saying "I'm trying to make your daughter just like you!" she was not amused.
It was very surreal. They were listening to a religious podcast on morality while they both went down on me.
Randomize
