I just got back to Nicks and I shoul dnot have drank this much when I have to work at 7AM!!!!!
You tied the party balloons to your nipple ring so that everyone would know you partied.
he came and i only had my diet coke to rinse.. can you say coke float?
I woke up to him eating me out, listening to classical music.
mid-sex i was thinking.. these are not the right balls slapping me
I came home ate all of my roomates poptarts and then vommited on her duvet cover. I don't think today is the day to suggest the whole "sex instead of rent money" idea
Fuckers are stealing our internet and making my porn stream slowly so I changed the password for VanceRefrigeration to RyansaCunt. No spaces but capitalization.
We have a nice shopping list..vibrators and roller blades
Priorities
Does me being hung over take away from how professional I can be today?
I woke up with Pop Rocks stuck to my ass
blue gatorade loses no color upon regurgitation
dave might be using McDoubles to pay for dances
he has gotten at least 7 lap dances out back
Can finally say I won't be lonely this Valentine's day! Mother nature decided to drop by.
Now that I'm sober I feel the need to tell you that I'm not really a fish whisperer....
Just a typical Friday. Dinner, drinks, doing lines with a member of Congress
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