im insabelyl wasted and diont know if ill yexyed tou. call me
ok, his religious views on facebook are madonna lyrics. we no longer have to wonder about his sexuality.
I saw him on the jumbotron, its like god doesnt want me to forget his tiny penis
I feel like just to watch it, I need to be high. To understand it, I'd need enough drugs to kill an elephant.
Bathroom attendant appreciated that hug I have him as a tip. Fucking BROKE these days.
THERE IS SOMEONE IN MY CAR MILKING HERSELF AND TELLING ME TO TRY IT
Word of advice, don't put your jar if peanut butter in the microwave, blue fire comes out
my mom just told me I should hit it and quit apparently she does not like this new girl
He talked for 3 hours straight on how his dad is a dentist how fuck do you think my night was
Every time I start to think he's just not worth the trouble, he puts his face down there and I wanna buy him a car
Sorry I pissed in your closet and lied to your parents that it was probably a flood. He got up to go to the bathroom, expecting sex when he got back, I panicked
If he's gonna send me dick pics; he should at least zoom in to make it look bigger.
You are the best. Or certainly adequate for tempering my unholy desires.
That's the nicest thing you've ever said to me.
Which president had the biggest dick?
Take your time, I'll wait
She was pretty impressed that I led all thirty of us back to campus in my state of drunk. Evidently so impressed that she now refers to me as "Moses" in bed.
Randomize
