Seeya bye Latvian government! Whammy!
let's makeout let's makeout let's make out let's make out
I tried to explain to him that we just wanted a stereotypical black friend to be in our group. He didn't take it too well... Never take me to the bar again.
The guy I fucked last night is well worth up the ass tuition. I just wish I could tell dad thanks!
Just blew a perc off the traytable on my flight, spring break has begun!!
Your lack of great college experience of margaritas and foam parties scares me
come over after work tomorrow, liz and i will make all of your wildest dreams come true. so long as your wildest dreams involve drinking champagne at my house with two girls who won't have sex with you.
I got carried to one bar. Got a piggy back ride to the next bar. I was just testing our drinking team for st pattys day to make sure they are able to handle me more drunk than that.
And I might get them triple pierced after that
Damn, I didn't realize you'd declared war on airport metal detectors
Is it socially acceptable to stop at the strip club for the lunch buffet on my way to the airport?
So she just had an emotional breakdown over a birthday card with a peacock on it. Yeah. She's pretty drunk, but we made it home safely.
Found sauce from last night's pizza rolls wedged under my phone case... While sitting in my 8 am class. What happened last night?
You were trust falling into bushes
I wrote him a note at the end of the final. I'm hoping I can flirt my way in to an A or B
I honestly think sometimes all you need is a $2 alcoholic punch poured from a jug into a big glass to feel better. I guess abblebees is my new problematic fav
Randomize
