Your friends ate a hole through an entire loaf of bread
i love waking up at 5am with an imprint of a toilet seat on my chest
I'm scared at the amount of beastiality in this conversation.
you know you've made it when it's your own pool table you're waking up on
You never go ass to mouth. That's quite possibly the most important rule Paramedic school has taught me.
Sitting in a bubble bath with my bong, how's your morning?
eat the baked goods on the counter at your own risk... i made them while i was angry and drunk so they most likely have pubes in them
DDing is such a bittersweet job, just got the entire history of this girls hookup career
I am a human short and spout . Here is my jager Herr is my redbull . When i get real drink i shout out. Tip me over and pour yeager out
im honestly just eating salsa and looking at his penis
He got a slutty, ugly mother of a 7 year old, and I got a dog that only sleeps and shits on clean clothes. No one won in this break up.
Remember that time you bought snap bracelets on Amazon and they sent you 300 pregnancy tests instead? Amazon knows.
Well, I dont really know how much penis you have at your disposal so I cant be sure
too bad we didn't bet. my 38-1 tears would have made great lubrication for a blow job.
What's the polite way to tell someone she's a grown ass woman and she needs to start acting like it.
Randomize
