Is it weird that I have contacts who i've classified as DO NOT ANSWER?
Lol no its called college
i just googled "what is oprah really like?" how do YOU think my night is going?
My cat puked at the same time as me. Makes me feel better about myself, except he can stand and I can't.
Just got my econometrics book in the mail and started flipping through it. Our Thursday parties may turn into u convincing me not to kill myself.
Are you pissed because you didn't get action, or the fact i got boned twice in public places tonight?
You coming bye my yot got egg sweet carilne vodklaa
So ahh..."Multicultural Night" turned into "Fuck the Neighbor Night"
Let's be honest. I make up for my well below average sized penis with a great personality and a possibly successful future
The gay is strong with you! You're more concerned about my outfit than my safety.
Your vase full of piss was still at his house and he still doesn't know.
We smoked a blunt in a stall where a drag queen was fucking a bartender in the ass. So theres gonna be a second date :)
Now that it's fall I have to prepare for the imminent arrival of ripped up sweatpants shoved into folded over sequined uggs
I'VE LOST MY DIGNITY, MY PRIDE, AND EVEN MY BOOTY CALL. HAPPY THANKSGIVING.
So let me get this straight I was getting drunk with our science teacher from high school and you got drunk with an 82 year old woman who invited you back to her house and made you sandwiches.
Yes.
He just told me I was beautiful, whilst I peed into a cup. If this isn't love I don't know what is.
Randomize
