I didn't realize how hung over I was until I rolled over and the world rolled over with me.
Dude she has a fucking rock collection. Never will I ever talk to her again.
Xanax and allergy medicine look a lot alike when you spill them on the floor. Just saying that I still have allergies but I'm unsure if I still have legs
It's amazing the difference a day and 2000 mg of antibiotic make. Nine days to go.
.....woke up with a tube of cinnamon buns in my pocket, i miss you
You were hanging upside down on the subway with your feet in the stirrup handle bars. the children were amused.
There is a literally infinite number of spliffs going around this table.
Delicious
I feel like I'm at a sushi bar with a spliff belt.
It was his first time doing shrooms and we made him ride in the truck bed. But he kept standing up and yelling when we stopped so we had to keep driving
I just spent a pre-4th of july celebration riding in a raft being towed by a car through a town that I've never heard of handing out flyers for a river rafting company that I never knew existed. Good night.
I spent ten minutes questioning her on what kind of cup she wanted... Then I asked what kind of water she wanted..
WOAH TOO HIGH
He was so drunk and proud of his 6-month-gym-results he actually made me touch his whole naked body.
just like cleaning my room and being more organized in my life. more so just making sure a toaster doesn't end up in my car again for 2 months
WOKE UP NEXT TO A PLATE OF MEATBALLS HAPPY MONDAY
how much of this shit do i need to take before i think its a good idea to set the house on fire and scream satanic mantras?
I think I fucked the doubts about us out of him
Randomize
