**i WaNt TO sLaP mY niECe wHO ThINks iT iS cUte tO WriTE LiKE tHiS**
Hey guys. This is Daniel texting on mayas phone. if she called you and told you that i made her have sex with me in my doghouse with my dog present that wasn't true.... so dont spread that.
So I went outside my house this morning and basically my entire front lawn is covered in gummi bears... I think that involves you guys.
MY DOG FOUND A BAG OF COKE ON THE SIDE OF THE ROAD!!!!!!!!!!!
AND ITS GOOD STUFF TOO!!!!!! AHHH!!!!!!
No mixer. Vodka in yogurt?
I sorta feel bad for the actual person in my fake id that got a drunk in public charge.
the ladder is at the bottom of the pool
But for future reference, it might help your game if you don't tell the girl you're trying to get on your dick that she's "not the worst thing you've ever seen"
You looked at my sister and yelled at her saying in a couple of years she will be yours
I have a surprise for you
Is it drugs? I want drugs. Or a puppy!
NO TEQUILA
Why do I always think it's a good idea? Like a challenge? Shit maybe I should CHALLEGE myself to get laid for once instead
Did you leave ur panties in the sink?
Kitchen or bathroom?
Update: day 5 and Scott has not left the apartment. Still smoking. Pizza roll supply dwindling.
All boys are excommunicated from my vagina until further notice.
I AM STRANGELY AROUSED BY THIS UNEXPECTED DEVELOPMENT AND I AM COMPLETELY OK WITH THIS.
Randomize
