you asked the guy at 7-11 if he remembered when you came in and threw news paper every where... then you did it again
when you get a chance can you look up 'free abortion clinic' for me? cuz i dont think i'll be lucky enough for a second miscarriage.
Okay I woke up in my room, snuggie on, had a water bottle in my hand my tv was on Disney channel and my cigarettes are gone. And I deleted every text in my phone but one that said 'you are absolutely welcome'
it was a 10 min screaming orgasm. i don't care that you were next door and didn't appreciate all the noise.
God damn him and his understanding ways and little hip muscle things.
I'm hungover as hell. I'm dying. I have no skin left on my knees
I'm just sad for you. It sucks that the 17 douchebag asshole guys you're fucking can't morph into one nice, normal, non-alcoholic guy that has a drivers license and no criminal history.
Dude, the coffee is horrible this morning, Cass changed something about it
We ran out of Bailey's Irish cream...
This is what regular coffee tastes like?!?! Fuck the adult life.
If by some world ending natural disaster I get into an actual relationship with this kid, should I tell him the truth about the web of lies I've based our current relationship on?
There is what appears to be urine on the woman's bathroom sink. I just have so many questions right now.
Wake up. Finish House of Cards. Put on pants.
Accurate.
I'm giving head in a stairwell, I'll be back in a few minutes. I'm so ashamed.
THERE IS A BABY THAT ISN'T MINE THAT'S GOING TO HEAR ME BEING SEXED!
I just realized now that I slept with him while he was still wearing the maid costume... I've reached a new level of sexual freakness.
He sent me the milestone first dick pic this morning, it looked like a baby's fist holding a tree trunk. I'm frightened and aroused in equal measure.
Randomize
