His mom made me a necklace that i am supposed to wear to prom. She included a note with it, which had a star trek quote. What have I gotten myself into?
If i see another girl turn you down you should either turn gay or just kill yourself
Its like the long john silvers of colleges, I wouldnt even go there to use the bathroom
white trash bash was a total success...cops shut it down twice and her hair stayed in rollers all night..she never broke character
He always grinds on me and is like "This is awesome because we're both Catholic!"
She's more of a "I'm gonna get herpes no matter how great her face looks like" pretty
he's dressed up as pikachu 3 fucking years in a row and gotten laid each time. i don't understand
Every man needs a table where they can sit and reflect on the successful penile conquests of the day.
Celebrating anything "Eve" is never a good choice! I feel like my soul's been put in a blender on the "destroy" setting- in other news: Happy 4th of July
Dude we smoked with a bunch of random stoners in a forest, then group hugged. It was the most magical thing we've ever done.
I can already feel the hangover I'll be having on New Year's Day. I don't know if I'm prepared for this.
Just keep your throat open and beer will always find its way in.
Which sister was it? The one I accidentally hit when my shoe flew off or the one I ate candy off of when we were high?
I like that they’re all named Christopher or Chris. No need to worry about moaning during!
I just woke up in a prom dress on your bathroom floor, yea I'm 32.
Randomize
