yes we were fucking thats why i put "watching a movie" in quotations
I just realized I'm gonna get paid at midnight on New Years Eve. That could be dangerous.
dude i need to stop getting high. i cant afford to eat like this...
you really dont want me to drink and drive. you saw what i did to my face and that was only from walking
HOW AM I SUPPOSED TO LOOK FUCKABLE IN AN ALL NEON SPANDEX JUMPSUIT?
He told me to fuck off at some point in the night. I think it was right before he jumped out of a moving car trying to get to another bar and made Abby cry.
She just kept saying "bless your heart" to him while he cried because he came so fast. I think a Texas woman was just what he needed
i would have thought, that you two being my best friends, one of you would have atleast tried to catch me before i hit the ground after blacking out.
In the last 3 months, I've slept with an ex,someone single, someone in a relationship, someone married, and someone divorced. I should get some type of grown up girl scouts badge.
I found three vicadin and a pint of fireball with the note. In case of emergency drink me under their sink.
What part of drinking with my mom makes you think i'd get naked
All of it
He played with my boobs the whole time we watched Scott Pilgrim and then started invited others to play with them too. It reminded me of how my mom gives out my french fries without asking.
Saved a second guy who was crying/on the verge of wigging out. Just call me the drug whisperer.
You threw your body across the gross couple hooking up on the couch and demanded they scratch your back. I love you drunk on peach schnapps
my experiences serve only to benefit you young virgin
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