I asked him where the store BJ's was and he unzipped his pants.
Im in your car brotha dog. Its was unlocked, so im gonna sleep in it. well i mean i think its your car be your car.
Let's just say my vagina is not superimpressed with the superintendent of schools.
Drunk cheerio confetti may seem like a brilliant idea when your drunk, but believe me, the next day, its a horrible, horrible mess.
And I can say one thing, I look pretty good in high wasted pants. I don't know if that helps. But I do. God I'm high.
I saw a picture of my dad holding my legs in a kegstand. Town festival=success.
Her boobs felt like beanie babies from heaven
I woke up in my living room, on the floor, wearing nothing but a fur coat?
All I have done at work today is eat and try to get my coworker to tie me to his bed again
No offense, I mean I'm sure you rocked my world and all but I don't remember.
I jumped out of a moving car going sixty into my driveway because I had to shit so bad. It is not a good day today.
He just seemed to happy to be having sex with me that it ruined the mood for me. I just wanted to punch him.
Tonight was a total waste of a shaved vagina
I knew the bike rally would be fun when I saw "male pole dancing" on the schedule
Too high to wash a dish but just high enough for a kitchen fire
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