I heard we made out
He told me to fart on his lap because the vibrations turned him on
is wine microwaveable?
Just walked in on my older brother getting a bj. He told the girl to "keep going" and then attempted to high five me
The lifeguard told us we had to move Mike before the tide came in when he passed out.
His penis without viagra is what breaks my heart.
OH YEAH AND FORGOT TO THANK YOU FOR THE lack of WARNING THAT HE WASN'T CIRCUMSIZED.
I did what any insensitive guy would do bought her friends shots and tried to fuck them
We fucked on a kid's slide, my vagina is singing praises of being used
She just got on the scale. frowned, got off and took off her pants and then got back on
looked up people from my old yearbooks. 3 ex boyfriends are gay. im getting drunk now.
Guess who has two thumbs and broke her boyfriends dick?
I'm getting 800 nuggets from McDonald's
I want to create a human. Discussion later.
I JUST WANT TO SIT IN MY UNDERWEAR AND WATCH THE BRAVES GAME AND NOT BE CONSTRAINED BY MY ED SHEERAN SHORTS
Randomize
