Well I thought that next 8 ball would either kill us or turn us into Gods
she said she missed her period, but is going to six flags... think im safe?
do you know anything about the $5 bill with my name stapled to it in my purse??
There's guys at my school running around throwing potatoes shouting "remember the famine." makes me proud to be Irish.
I wasn't interested in him...but then he played The Office theme song on acoustic guitar. I'm sorry.
So high. I just took a picture of my chewed gum so I can remember to paint a picture of it as a cloud later.
found out the liquor store price matches. thus begins senior year of college
Now he's lighting his socks on fire
the ceiling is raining jello shotss
sooo... you have no idea who nailed their tubesocks to my wall?
i wasn't gonna shower then i remembered i slept in my own piss
They're re-releasing Titanic in 3-D. Can I interest you in a joint venture to create the greatest drinking game of all time? I think yes
It turns out my English teacher used to pose for Playboy. She's an inspiration.
No just a list of 20 of my favorite things
Where are penises on the list
Where am I on the list
Under penises
Ya, It's probably because whenever I close my eyes I see a kitten playing a banjo.
Randomize
