You should never have let annie watch you have sex with other women
sometimes i wish i could just stick a turkey baster up there and suck out the blood
So I used the "I've never cummed from a BJ before" line last night.
And that worked?
9 for 9! Not only does it give them a goal but they have a sense of accomplishment afterwards.
Nah you can have him. There's too many men in my life right now. I can't handle another dick.
I really wasn't that bad. I thought I was pretty tame.
When Anthony passed out you poured vodka on his face
Is it penis luge time yet?
WHYAREWHITEGUYSSOBADINBED?! What the fuck went wrong, evolution?
I sat on the toilet and peed through my jeans, then I pissed the bed and blamed him...do you think well have a 2nd date?
Brownies hit. And just found beer. And the bill cosby show is on. And its in spanish.
Whiskey and an unstable home life is apparently the fountain that 20-something boys like to drink from.
I was scared that I should know him but I was too busy blacking out to remember
You both ran and jumped into the tub yelling Jamaican bobsled team
Still at home. Videotaping hamsters.
If you don't ever hear from me again, just know that I loved you
Jesus Christ that's like a real possibility
I can see the future and your future is full of penis
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