guys are not supposed to queef...right?
He drunk dialed T-Mobile at 3am and talked to them for 45 minutes and got his phone bill lowered from $80 to $60... Best drunk dial ever.
Next thing I know we're all standing in the kitchen holding hands and thanking God for the beer.
Subtly mention that I'm not a lesbian. I would only go for rebecca's nipples because they're pierced and I like shiny things.
we should hire that guy that makes pancakes that we met last weekend for our next party. He can feed us, and regulate!
My stepdad and I just tag-team hit on a server at McDonald's. This is the man I should have grown up with.
It's was about average. But he had a tat on his thigh that said "pull-out n' rollout" so I won't have to worry about a round two request.
It's like you're the one guy who got the "girls have clits" memo.
I don't believe in coincidence. I believe in the stars aligning perfectly to sodomise me in public. Who ever said I was cynical?
When nipples stop being hilarious I'll stop getting them out in public.
Not my type, but the penis looks fun.
For not really liking Christmas, I have an astounding amount of holiday-themed lingerie
Judging by his bulge. This guy is going home with me. Who doesn't want a dick that looks like it used to be a pillar in Rome.
You know you're gay when you have to have your coworkers explain to you why your bracket is terrible
It’s like my vagina just knows when a man is a barrel-chested freedom fighter.
Randomize
