I no longer want to be the gay that plays in the revolving door at RelationshipDale's like a seven year old with a.d.d.
Hookers taste better with whip cream
Maybe we ought to get some pennicillin too
Fair enough
you're the only person i know to use "jizz" and "cute" in the same sentence.
Your ability to be a slut in your nightmare astounds me
I also tried to drunkenly adopt a kitten last night. It didn't pan out.
Idea for the cake. Joints for candles. Do it.
someone to text and fuck? since when does that constitute a relationship?
since 2006
You started an entire relationship based only on sex and emoticons.
she's unstoppable after she starts doing shots and yelling NANNER
Those were some damn good pancakes you made last night.
Dude I've been in FL since Monday.
The annual Father's Day Wake and Bake has been canceled due to lack of hustle.
i mean hes a break dancing puerto rican, how do you think the sex was?
He told me he needed "space" but then goes and likes my insta of panacakes.. Done.
Working from home has been great for my sex life! A few of my neighbors are in open marriages and several more wish they were!!!
Do thigh high boots and a ball gag count as a costume?
Randomize
