A homeless man in dtwn SF was blasting lil wayne and singing at the top of his lungs. I kinda wanted to give him my life savings
the best part about tonight...knowing when i wake up in the morning his car will still be full of packing peanuts..and mine wont
It feels like he gave my taint an indian burn.
We'll make it into fun. If I can make wii bowling into a drinking game, I can make studying spanish into a sex game.
whoever created level 16 on brickbreaker is a dick
I'm ready for my liver to be the last casualty of 2009
dude. she was texting with her nipple. I love touch screen phones!
And my fence, why is part of it on the roof?
okay. this is james and youre probably never ever gonna see me again unless i really really really want some pussy. sorry.
I found out Naomi Campbell and I have the same birthday and I feel like that explains so much
Long story short I'm making an I'm sorry card for a girl I dont remember having sex with
Well that was the first and last time I've had to write "divorce party" on a request time off form. I'm throwing it for my mom. What is my life turning into.
That sounds worse than that time you thought out an entire story of how big bird would kill you
Since I won't be making love with anyone on a bed of roses this year on Sunday I bought a Mustang to fill the gap
Don't be upset because I bitch slapped you with intelligence
Randomize
