yeah...it smells like an asshole would smell if someone ate sewage.
BLOW JOB GIRL IS IN WALMART
Some people actually refer to her as Kaitlyn you know.
You don't know the meaning of what the fuck until you wake up naked and alone in someone's bed staring at a dead squirrel on their dresser.
I'm really good at handling things like foreskin and speech impediments.
perfect. if all else fails remind him how anxious he is. talk real fast and induce a panic attack that only I can remedy with xanax.
Took me 10 minutes of oral to finally get him hard for like 30 seconds of sex until he came and passed out. Def not worth the ROI.
Funny, 'cause his story is it went great. He faked passing out so he wouldn't have to do anything in return.
You gotta hand it to him. 6 hours in a new town and he's already fuck someone, had his ass kick by her bf, and rounded up a posse of people to kick this guys ass.
Got my parents to pick me up from the party, take me to the bar and buy all my drinks, then drop me off at my booty calls house.
I accidentally called my professor daddy...and I think he liked it. Help, I'm scared.
My adderall dealer raised his prices due to "impending inflation" ... never buying from a college grad again
HOW THE FUCK IS IT POSSIBLE THAT THE JUNIOR HIGH STUDENT IS BETTER AT BEING AN ADULT THAN I AM!?!?
He walked into the bar with a pillow and put his head down...nuff said
It's routine now. He comes home from work and i ride him like a cowgirl with only a few sips of wine. I love being his neighbor.
Sarah just give sum homeless dude a lap dance, took like 2$ worth of change from his cup and was all like, "Biiitch, this aint free"..
I’m lazy so obviously looking like a rotisserie chicken is my favourite position
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