drunk doesn't even begin to explain it. dude called him and said to bring you back because he'd already called dibs.
i'm sorry, i thought "hey, she wants TO FUCK YOU" was a good enough cue
I cant talk about it right now or let you guess, but its something you and i would do. Kinda like that time we had the case of beer and went bowling
You hooked up with minors in a golf cart?
Ha ha. You should see the things I'm doing to my body at Bob Evans.
I'm laying in bed with a case of beer,.. That's how this break up is going..
I just want to know what horrible accidents of evolution allowed that tiny penis to exist
Tell me not to purchase 500 ball pit balls and a kiddy pool
No
How do you feel? I threw up in a towel. Also, a lot of other things.
We had sex twice and at Wendy's how dare you diminish that.
yup and then I snapped out of it and realized I was playing beer pong against a 4 year old... and losing
fuck you
also please return my underwear, they were one of my favourite pairs xo
I have rug burns on my nipples. Thanks for being an awesome wing girl.
i have two papers due tomorrow. contemplating if i should take adderall in my anus for full effects
I'm literally watching a webcam of the Vegas strip right now and it is making me sad.
He woke me with blue berry pancakes and a blow job. He's a keeper.
Randomize
