Im handcuffed to some kid i hardly know. there are no cops involved
which bright sisters idea was it to put semi-formal in the middle of no-shave november?
I'm playing the Jersey Shore drinking game by myself at my mom's house. Things like this are not okay after college.
The doctor put me on 3000 mg of amoxicillin a day. Which, for a sinus infection, seems pretty excessive to me.
Maybe he was just trying to knock out any potential ghonorrhea you might be carrying around.
Ah, my reputation precedes me.
taking a shot every time they compare curling to a real sport
I may be the first guy in history to get dome while watching An Extremely Goofy Movie.
Right before he passed out, he said "Stuporman, coming in for a landing"
She called herself a train and then took off all her clothing. I forget everything after that.
I saw you two flinging Jello at the sidewalk if that helps jog your memory.
Nobody is stopping the marines from drinking in class on veterans day. They literally brought a cooler with a bottle of whiskey and vodka on ice. And are passing out red cups to anyone interested. Staying in Vegas for college has officialy become an A+ decision
How was the rest of your night?
A little fuzzy and a lot naked.
We're having chugging races with long island ice tea, I won. To often
Our DD painted my costume on me for tonight. The strippers have been teaching him how to paint costumes.
she's the poster child for how alcoholism can be fun.
ok but bondage is pretty much my easy mode
Sorry I fucked your cousin. Again. I just wanted him to take me on his boat.
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