The nice sales man at 711 gave me a handful of free lighters for buying a carton of cigarettes. I guess the depressed damsel in distress look works for me.
A disheveled girl in front of me just looked down, shrieked, and yelled to the girl next to her "what is this" while pointing at two large white stains near the crotch of her black jeans. I love that Thursdays are weekends, it makes awesome Friday mornings
You are the worst kind of disappointment. The responsible kind.
Um I think everyone drunk and there's some douche on violin.
i don't know what happened by from the looks of her lipstick I'd say she was skull fucked by a rhino
I want him in the "you're a terrible idea and are probably going to get me killed by my parents, my siblings, and my boyfriend" way
Dunno yet. Probably just gonna play the s.t.d. russian roulette game with random bartenders at the beach again. Same 'ol same 'ol
Life isn't about who you kiss, drunk, at midnight. It's who you text nonsense to, sober, from the toilet.
shes making a cheerios necklace using dental floss 'just in case' she gets the munchies later
I told you you to bring something to share....you brought tequila and a condom
Blowing lines in the bathroom and trying to get into the mindset of someone who wants to be at work for 12 hours
I don't even care if you were high. The fact that I've been begging for us to have those cinnamon rolls for months and you didn't even save me one is not ok.
he bought me ice cream then took me home and fucked the shit outta me. you can't write this kinda romance.
If I take a couple more shots I won't even know he's a Mormon that drives a motorcycle
he just kept biting everyone and singing hilary duff songs. i can't even bring him to a gas station.
Randomize
