Going to pass out with da shoes on. hugging wallstreet journal from tuesday. please check me for liveliness in the morning.
the realtor just asked me if i've ever made meth on this property.... i need to do something about my hair
On second thought, trying to signify she was a butter face by wiping my bagel on her cheek may not have been in my best of interests
I need to get a life, I am either crying at every glee episode or just wanting to blow rails off photos of us
We did it in the bathroom in Taco Bell. We didn't buy anything before we left, which I thought was rude.
Apparently, "please don't I have to be in court tomorrow" is not a valid excuse for a girl to abstain from giving a massive hickey.
I'm covered in European cum. How's your day going?
Whatever she smells like compost and feathers.
I believe they call that patchouli.
Or maybe I'll just keep introducing myself like, hello, they call me iane because I need the D. Applications are submitted online, women need not apply.
This morning confirmed it...there's no maybe about it. She definitely wasn't born with it. It was definitely the Maybelline.
I had sex in an engineering office last night. So that could be your life. I was mounted on top of a sketch of a future parking lot for a maintenance building. If that's not romantic, idk what is
I had sex while you were puking this morning and I'm sorry. Kind of.
It's ok. I had sex while you were drunk crying last night. We're even.
He walked in on me banging his sister and said "you're both old enough to make you own decisions. Carry on"
That jawline could fucking have its way with me.
dude idk where I am. fuckin like. there wheat field and a horizon and shit. I think I got on a bus? some dude named Sam gave me a pamphlet about Jesus.
Randomize
