Dude, I just had an awesome rave/orgy with like bunch of hot Asian chicks on a cable car. It was like being in a Gwen Stefani video, cept w/o the bad spelling
God, I love San Francisco.
Can one do a walk of shame from one's own hotel? Considering I just barfed in a planter down town in from of a bunch of business men in suits on my way to a work breakfast on a Wednesday morning, I am gonna just go with yes.
new low.... made out with someone while peeing
I told him we couldn't have sex because I was ovulating and "I come from fertile people."
It took 5 minutes to find my bra.. in his car.
It was tug of war between me and the cop. He wanted the beer, I wanted the coozie.
i really regret not blowing your cousin before he went to jail
You started throwing frozen shot glasses at people and you kept saying "it's fine, they melt."
I was paranoid that someone would jizz in my hair while I had the cucumbers over my eyes. Super-High Spa Day didnt work out.
When the nurse referred to my vag as "your downstairs", I knew I found the perfect Doctors office.
My snow day: told Cam, "we're not dating today, we're just roommates." No bra, boxers, drinking whiskey by myself for the past 2 hours, yelling at The Ultimate Fighter reruns from 3 years ago.
I like that you use a Disney movie to describe the starting of our BDSM relationship, lmao
Can't tell if it's the drugs or science magic, but I *THINK* that mouse just turned into a squirrel.
you were shouting "me peeing on him is the closest he'll EVER get to my vagina!"
And tell your penis that we can hang out tonight for sure.
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