but i really can't criticize. i blacked out waaaaaay ahead of schedule.
My RA just gave me tips on how to have discreet shower sex. Were we that loud?
I was wondering where I've seen this kid then I remembered I saw him doing lines of blow of his gf's leg while she was sleeping last week.
You're just mad at the fact that I want to be a car alarm.
My penis has a 100% approval rating. He has never received a formal complaint. If you'd like to file one, you can go fuck yourself.
omg. MEgabus. stoned.
Theres these two guys talking.
Tell Taylor to rock on. Tell her she is so beautiful that the sun shines down on her face and shows her beauty. Tell her to live on, like Martin Luther King. He'll never die. He's living his dreams.
these are times I'm glad I'm Jewish because the Torah is just like "drink, eat, and fuck"
I mean in all honesty I would let James Franco shit on my chest. End of story
I'm giving random strangers at the bar sips of my fishbowl, then telling them I have Ebola. It's a fun night.
Unless he's under 18, in which case you put him back where you found him this instant.
Because you hugged a homeless guy, and I paid him 5 bucks to give us our giraffe balloon animal back. That's why.
Where is everybody?
It's pretty much split between the strip club and jail.
On a side note. I slept with a stuffed giraffe last night. Found it in my bed when I came home and snuggled with it. Drunk me reverted to being 2
I just found a nug casually in my room under my duffel bag. Is this a sign I need help?
Randomize
