Good luck man
I dont need it. Shes easy.
her vagine was all disorganized.
Yeah..And after he fingered me, he wiped it on my face and laughed.
ew wtf
You make shower sex sound like waterboarding
The cops forgot your handle of tequila when they took you away. Taking shots in your honor amigo
Her hair goes down to her lower back and nobody was there to held it back for her. She looked like chewbacca dipped in vomit.
The little girl I babysit saw pink plastic shot glasses in my car and asked what they were for and I told her they were princess teacups.
I want to see boobs tonight. Like, real ones. Your ones.
I'm romantic.
I don't want random pictures of your morning wood. It's like, what a glorious morning oh a penis.
I never thought in a million years that I would have a threesome with my boss and his wife and yet here we are.
Him showing up yesterday was like a giant ego stroke for my vagina.
Said he wanted to wear me as a loincloth. Not sure if sexual or predatory
I just had a 10 minute staring contest with my dog. Can you come over?
Thanks for letting me cross "getting high at park with children" off my bucket list
He has fairy lights round his bed.. And played Jamie cullum when we had sex... Hes batting for the other team right?
Randomize
