so Mike and I made a deal. we'd do anal if he would help me pick out carpet tomorrow.
What...you let him do that?
It wasnt that bad. the two minutes it took is nothing compared to the 10 hr day I have planned for him tomorrow
If i come home from court on friday.. i'm definitely doing something illegal.
all i wanted to do was something grown up. like go to applebees and drink.
After much deliberation I've decided to name my penis "Arthur", hope your mom's surgery goes well.
My heart is having a hard time convincing my vagina he's not worth it.
If this outfit doesn't get me pregnant tonight I don't know what will...
shes on the ground doing bicycle kicks screaming "is my ass good enough for you now satan" send help
You. Dating a sex offender cop. Life writes itself sometimes.
He sent me a text from across the party that said "your sexy." I just couldn't.
So when's a good time this week to show up at your apartment in nothing but a trench coat and a bow? Y'know. Hypothetically.
Owwww. A manager/ employee sex scandal that DOES NOT involve me! SCORE!!!
We were like one big happy Eskimo family.
its the 14th virginity that counts the most anayways
Be careful, there is sex in the air.
yeah, my mom got it for me because it had animals AND alcohol.
Randomize
