My ? Is...... Would it be sweet or creepy to take a girl on a first date to chigago?
creepy.
I am pretty sure the guy in the stall two dwn from me is jerking it...seriously
I just love slightly exposed cleavage. Not too much to be whory but just enough to say "your kids will never go hungry"
My student's should feel privledged to see me tuesday after the amount of alcohol I consumed this weekend.
I'm gonna laugh so hard when we're both married with families
That statement alone makes me laugh so hard.
Crisis Situation. How do you have that "we probably shouldn't make out tonight cause i've got an oral herpes outbreak coming on" conversation on a third date.
I think I may have appendicitis, but the house is like two blocks from the hospital so I'm just gonna go and drink anyway.
I'm going to keep a tally of how many lives I ruin this summer. Starting today.
Already at 3 and it's not even noon.
You know you're an adult when you break 100 to get 75 cents, to buy a condom from a bar vending machine in South Boston.
I literally paid cover, got kicked out. Tried to explain that I was just clumsy, but mispronounced it. Then I got pissed off, stormed out..and clotheslined myself on a velvet rope. How was your night?
Who the fuck cries when they're stoned?!
Sorry man I just really wanted a McChicken
Well I guess I'll go shower now and wash all the stripper off.
You now have the mental image of me flying off into the sunset with no pants
Nothing kills the mood quicker than kneeing him in the face during sex
I just wanna be euthanized
Thas it
Randomize
