ok this is the part where i go up stairs and pass out incoherently untill 6 30 tommaorw morning and not rember any of this. love youuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuu!
I definitely managed to work the word "aforementioned" into the conversation.. At least I'm an intelligent sexter.
Either I'm a lot drunker than I thought, or he has three dicks....
I think I'm gonna have to go with the first one...
So I just tried to wake him up with a blow job and he literally touched the top of my head and said snooze button
We just reached that moment of the night when you start making cookie quesadillas. Party on Wayne
No more jager for that guy. He jacked the neighbor kids big wheel, rode around making jet noises, then passed out behind the wheel and rolled it and broke his wrist
He told me he doesn't want to fuck anymore because he needs to focus on school. Either he grew a vagina or he's secretly gay, it has to be one of the two.
Go for gold. Two birds with one vag.
My class coordinator for bio told us that the only thing we should do the night before an exam is to get laid. And then party down after the exam. I like him.
I hate being the only medical professional in the group. I always end up patching you guys or being the DD when I'm on call. I have problems I need to drown in booze too...
Even blacked out me knows not to sleep with socks on
IT'S LIKE LOOKING INTO GOD'S VAGINA!!!!
No I feel the same as usual. Mopey with a chance of bitch fits.
After I chugged my beer the cop slapped my ass and said "atta girl" this can't be real life.
My theory is if i keep drinking, evolution will kick in and I will grow a bigger, faster, and more improved liver by January.
Randomize