you proceeded to suck on ur pinkie saying it reminded you of chris and you wanted him badly
please explain to me why there is a shopping cart in my living room.
First date. He's wearing a tuxedo shirt and keeps asking me about our future children. Escape plan #3 is now in action...
I know what youre going to say and vodka only explains half of my sitation
you know who we are? We're the female white stoner version of Kenan and Kel.
mind if i send you a dick pic? so you can see what she wasn't doing right?
official rule: if your drunk, it doesn't count
then nothing in my life counts
My vagina loves me do-dah do-dah my vagina loves me do-dah do-dah
I picture you throwing your vagina around in the same fashion that they pass out candy at a parade.
AFTER I licked the bald guys head they told me we weren't playing
I made a wizard staff out of Keystone light... I am therefore the smoothest wizard in all of our university's history.
god it feels good to gold a bottle of opiates again.
I think that typo was actually more appropriate than what you intended.
The memory of your penis haunts me. I must learn to be satisfied with lesser men than you.
She yelled out "MCDREAMY" mid orgasm
you were so high you just watched the elf.... its spring
WHY are you masturbating to hockey fights?
Randomize
