you're like a bully in the Christmas story
She was Ugg boots AND a Bumpit. Of course I didn't sleep with her.
Drinking mikes hard & watching the swan princess. i fucking LOVE college
Oh and fyi, I've been drinking and about to do free weights. I'll late you know how this goes.
Absinthe night with my dad again, I could get used to this being home thing.
Make the kitchen floor stop waving. Im trying to lay on it
started my period, we have to try again next week
if we have anymore sex before that my dick is gonna fall off. that is in no way a complaint
They have a genuine stripper pole secured to the floor of their living room. I am thoroughly take advantage of it. I've made $5 so far. Why don't more places have poles??!
You forget how awesome toilet paper is until you have to wipe your ass with a piece of notebook paper...
I disagree, if your last name is Weiner then the sending of dick pics should be mandatory. I'd give him a pass.
I just got my evaluation. My manager told me he hated my guts and pretty much wanted to stab me in the face. Then he gave me an "exceeds expectations" on pretty much everything and a raise.
Sex should not remind me of how baby birds get fed
Trust no bitch in laser tag. Not a single one.
My penis has like 3 people bidding on it
ALSO I MAYBE ACCIDENTALLY HAND CUFFED MYSELF TO A CHAIR
Randomize
