Hallmark should totally make "congratulations on getting your period" cards...I feel they would be quite popular.
i would give spencer pratt a bj just so i could bite his dick off
he'd just find a way to get more famous from being a eunich.
They just gave us root beer floats. I guess I won't quit my job today.
I wish I had my own personal Asian lady that lived under my bed so that she could wax my eyebrows and give me a pedicure whenever I wanted.
The 30 seconds of sex was almost worth it...I mean he did smoke me out and watched the princess and the frog with me
Yeah I had to push her down the hallway to the hotel room in a luggage carrier. The guy at the desk told me goodluck
and on the second day it was tequilla tuesday. and the lord saw it was good.
Just come back with most of your limbs...and your dick. Please and thank you
This coming from the girl who broke up with a guy because she found out he played the tuba in middle school.
By the way I peed in a mug last night cause you were in the bathroom and im pretty sure it is still in the kitchen.
The amount of drugs I did this weekend make me concerned about my health but at the same time fascinated to see if I could do more
Why did the sexual harassment class show a clip from frozen?
sorry for running off in the middle of that heart to heart. free food.
Don't forget my pants whenever you come over, otherwise we can't get in.
I'm hearing voices and sirens. I'm scared. I heard a manatee out there.
Randomize
