she insisted i was the anonymous guy on formspring that kept asking to bang her
Clearly I went along with it
Horny girl and non horny girl have different views on life
He played a tape of his mad rapping skills after the final...his rapper name was Mad Stylz and he rapped about all the pussy he got in the 90's. I love Sociology.
Chicken strips. I got my nose broken because of Chicken strips.
Nothing like an alcohol-fueled, 6-hour-long hunt for weed--complete with occasional breaks for sex.
My drug dealer just asked me to go see Les Mis on Christmas. Should I be worried this is some type of musical set-up?
Prop 8 repealed and I FINALLY got my period. Good day for America!!!
Do they mail horrible human being awards or do I have to pick it up or what's the protocol on that shit
Got stiff armed by the garbage man on the back of the truck...I just wanted to ride one block dude
tell me you did not just describe yourself as "hot and bothered"
Well my unnaturally hairy chest finally came in handy. It took at least an hour to shave the american flag into my chest but I definitely went America all over that party
WHEN JENDA BENDA THE DRAG QUEEN TELLS YOU TO RUN, YOU RUN, BITCH!!!
I'm out of milk so I'm dunking my Oreos in Bailey's; this is my life now.
Like seriously how stupid drunk do you have to get befor you start finding dolphin lighters and shit in your undergarments
We have been dating for 5 months. I'm friends with his sister. Yet my number in his phone is still saved as "hot bartender"
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