You're mentally unstable and I would hate to be you
Michael Jackson had a heart attack when he found out boyz to men was a music group not a delivery service.
New drinking game watching teenage mutant ninja turtles movie and drinking every time raphael says damn, someone says april or ms oneil, and shredder appears And every time we see a mustache
"Tonight I'm turning swine flu into an std" this might be how zombies come about. Peace civilization.
You decided to make a porno with gummy bears and things went downhill from there.
There aren't nearly as many guys masturbating on chatroulette as i was led to believe...i feel cheated
This went bad. Everyone is crying, i dont know why and I am really uncomfortable.
I need to sleep with 3 more guys by midnight to meet my 2010 resolution..
Do you know anything about the Easter basket sitting on my doorstep filled with porn and peeps?
Im so tired of dysfunctional exs fucking up my relationships with future dysfunctional exs
A girl at the bar is wearing green body paint instead of a shirt. Where are you?!
Paige is home safe.
Actually, she's here now, punching me in the face. You should've kept her keys.
Spent 38 bucks on dollar wells last night. I'm pretty sure my liver is staging a mutiny right now.
Took the ex out to the bar, then left with her and her best friend....and you said this was a bad thing.
Have you ever thought, hey maybe the reason we were togather that long was because I was drunk the whole relationship?
Randomize