You smell like stripper and shame
At dinner I grabbed his hand and he screamed "mom she just grabbed my penis" the proceeded to shove my hand down his pants! Hello Mr.Dick!
But sometimes ur dick treats me better than u do
And then he asked the cop "shall i shut off the lady gaga?" as he was being frisked.
I need to stop hooking up with boys in my major. three boys in one class is just a litttle too awkward.
Where are you? I hear fireworks and you've gone missing. I'm sure that is not coincidence.
It's been a year of occasional hook ups....this was bound to happen sometime even with your jank ovary schedule.
Thing I said while arguing: I want to be single again so that I can have pizza and dick rained down upon me.
Pulling out all the stops on being a lady.
I'm sending you the three minute video I jus took,....it's of me eating a pear up close
You kept trying to get the girl i brought home to hook up with you by enticing her with 12 baconnators you brought home
I fingered myself to realization that I don't need birth control if there is never a guy.
JUST BECAUSE I LIKE TO BE TIED UP AND SPANKED DOESNT MEAN IM GOING TO LIKE TO BE TIED UP AND SPANKED AT WORK
especially when i'm drunk. his dick might as well be made of cotton candy.
Hiking for a first date sounded like a good idea in theory because there was absolutely no possibility of me blacking out. In practice, I'd rather black out than go through what I just went through.
I mean, you've had my nipples in your mouth now, so I think we've reached a certain level of friendship.
Randomize
