At a bar where three women in denim shorts are debating techniques and skillsets for wrangling goats. You stay classy Delaware.
she had the hairiest bush ive ever seen. it looked like a spoiled head of lettuce.
THEY WONT LEYT ME IN AND I REALLY NEED SOME FRUIT
please visit steve this weekend, he is getting mature and responsible and shit which scares me.
my bowl and the doses are under your mom's passenger seat
repeat: THERE IS LSD AND THC IN YOUR MOM'S CAR. HELP ME HELP US AVOID FELONIES
I SHITYOUNOT DAN JUST PUNCHED A DEER IN THE FACE. MID LEAP.
Do you remember doing synchronized hip thrusts to Michael Jackson? Probably one of my favorite parts of the night
That tingly feeling you're experiencing in your lady parts is my mustache. All the ladies of America are waking up feeling the same thing. You're welcome.
In my opinion the party was fun, but i did A LOT of cocaine so my view was a little distorted......
He didn't have much of a personality. But I had like 100 orgasms, so that's cool.
He sends me pictures of his dogs and I send him my tits, it's a win win situation
so this maintenance guy stood at the corner of my cubical and scratched his balls for like a full minute cause he thought no one could see him
I accidentally told my mom I broke my drug nail this weekend
The only words I could make out were "Dicksmash McIroncock".
Last time we had sex i was dressed like a ninja turtle and someone else was in our bed, so this time should be fine.
I hope ur kiddin
wish i was
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