just watched an entire episode so you think you can dance for head. so wasn't worth it
he would probably call me "ma'am" when he's inside me. people love saying weird shit inside me.
So we are lighting beer bottles on fire and breaking them in half to make glasses
That sounds dangerous
Don't worry......were wearing oven mits.
There is a nerf war going on here. I just cleaned the blood out of the fridge
College freshman give noticeably better blowjobs by the 5th week of the semester.
You're gonna judge me.
Howd you sleep with him already
I'm having one of my monday morning walk of shame coffees if you care to join.
Wait, you seriously DON'T keep vodka in your backpack??!??!?
Fuck you fireball...just straight up fuck out of here
Rather than admit to myself I've spent $756 at the bar this month, I'm just going to pretend I gave it to a homeless person...kind of makes me feel better.
Eat your greens and take your tequila shots
so, i guess i gotta chill on showing up to work hungover... someone anonymously left a bible in my work mailbox (no one else got one)
Hey do you or anyone you know want to get drunk for free? At 4pm tonight at rctc for field sobriety training for future cops
Sorry for peeing on your books last night. I wouldn't leave them next to the window anymore.
LOOK AT HOW SMOOTH THIS BITCH IS
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