i've alrwady decidided boys hate me plkease take notyes.
what
nvm
I have a pretty basic diameter of my vaginal abyss. I'm sure it won't hurt.
Why do all fat girls have "that smell"?
between my moustache and how drunk I am it will be a miracle if I get laid tonight.
just peed in the tub. didnt notice the passed out drunk guys there until a minute in
I think you're asking the wrong person. You don't understand. Like I would fuck the act of fucking itself if I could.
We simultaneously blacked out then simultaneously came to then simultaneously had sex with the neighbors. We're definitely meant to be roommates.
I still think he fell and scraped his elbow and lost his credit card buying 8 hot chocolates for hobos
Do you still speak french? one of two girls I woke up with only speaks french...
I really feel like I should slow down on the getting hammered. I told a bartender on "Taco Tuesday" that a $3 margarita was too expensive. And proceeded to have a $70 tab.
A gay dude just spanked me with a nicholas sparks novel and called me foxy. I'm putting this on my resume.
fuck whipped cream. I'd eat vegetables off those abs
We broke into the kitchen, stole cooking aprons, and wore them on the dance floor.
We fucked to Bonnie Tyler in my car. He's the one.
What. The. Fuck.
You'll have to be more specific. I do a lot of "what the fuck" kind of stuff
Randomize
