I did that thing where I cum for no reason again.
how can you tell if its a queef or a fart from that close?
sitting in room practicing taking shots. has my life come to this?
He doesn't like you, he likes u not having a gag relfex
I dont know why the TSA people are looking at me wierd. I mean there is no way i am the only hungover college girl here with nine tally marks on her hand and last nights glitter on her face
I'm stranded in the Hampton area. Looks like I'm going to have to take one for the team and pass out by this applebees.
You chest bumped everyone we walked by on the way home... Even girls
The look on the dr's face when she asked me the last time i had sex and i responded "like an hour and a half ago" ... priceless
And literally 4loko margaritas are callin my name. They're like "Hey girl come on over here I'll make you forget about grades and boys and it'll be a good idea to send everyone 55 snapchats of your cleavage" ok
Don't forget to bring $1s for the strippers. Make it rain!!!!
Thanks, mom, will do
its not even a love triangle. its a love square and it has come back to haunt me
Tell him that his phone is taped to the dog's stomach. Stop trying to call it because it makes him scared.
Heading there now. Already have a boner.
Unless you want to see me masturbate, I think skype is a no go for now.
I would totally suck a dick for some poutine right now
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