So would u like to explain why you ate all my pickels and took my 1800?
About that, i have your 1800 on my desk with intentions of returning it but theres nothing i can do about the pickels
Cure to hiccups..road head..high five
I had to sleep with my math professor to pass algebra. Apparently my blowjobs are only C+ quality
"The juvenile turned and faced the officer, unzipped his pants, placed a fresh cigarette in between his legs and preceded to light it with a match"
just saw someone in just a bathrobe not even tied shut run to the bathroom with a facefull of cum. Someone had a good night
sorry for the naked aussie man in your room last night, he got lost on his way to the bathroom
Maybe I'm a robot.
You can't be that drunk already
I wouldn't blame my organs if they just decided to quit working after this weekend
He showed me a picture of his baby hamsters and I called them "Mammal McNuggets"
this st patricks day sucks
ill send jameson via bank tube 150+ miles
I've covered myself in body paint in the likeness of R2D2 and I still didn't get laid. Please explain.
Giant stained glass jesus is judging my black pleather pants
Just fyi i'm now butt naked in a steam room smoking a bong in some guys house. i sense the weed penetrating my pores.
who gets drunk at chipotle by noon and then gets kicked out? this chick.
It was like Strip poker and blow, but with Yu-Gi-Oh cards
Randomize
