Dude. Muppets take manhattan on netflix instant. Pass my midterm or relive my childhood? Tough decision.
Because ur a stupid bitch
Actually, I'm graduating from college on Saturday so that makes me a well educated bitch.
id like to point out that while i was just peeing a condom fell out of my vag.
You totally drew a penis wizard on my closet that says "I travel for cock rock"
I officially lit my glove on fire while lighting the bong. Winter needs to end.
Its not college unless your study breaks were to go throw up from blacking out the night before
I'm currently being signed up to be painted nude for a college art class. ah yes best high decision ever
Maybe if he'd step up his game and get a real job instead of donating plasma and trying to grow pot then you wouldn't feel compelled to write prisoners in Oregon.
Gross! What the hell is that?!?
It's quite clearly a man posing erotically with multiple packages of bacon.
Just saw my ex AGAIN. The constellation of gays must be at some sort of weird point with Mercury.
Glitter fights sound a lot funner in theory.
So as you were leaving, you leaned on the table too much and 3 glasses slid and fell to the floor. You then looked at me and said "To be honest, glass isnt that expensive anyways" and stumbled out of the bar.
I sent him a tex saying, "I thought my intentions were clear" drunk me has some balls.
The bouncer just called me magically delicious... apparently I'm a lucky charm. hollllleeeerrrr!
I fucked a 6 foot tall guy who has abs showing without even flexing... I am a wizard and I have magical powers.
Randomize
