check it out our google latitudes are spooning
Did you call me this morning? I was really drugged up and don't remember.
Have a good day. My vagina shrank.
New drink name: the Vermont Douchebag. Take shot of maple syrup, drop into cup of jager, bomb.
i made the cop pinkie-promise not to arrest me if i failed the breathalizer.
in case you havent found it already in honor of Toy story 3 we wrote ANDY on the bottom of your foot while you were passed out on the couch.
thank you TLC waking up to a water birth on tv really put the cherry on top of my hangover...
he tried to breastfeed my turtle
if you need to find her look her up on www.imastupidslut.org
.org?
yeah. they're non profit. helps them sleep at night.
I got pulled into the conversation by "she sleeps with everybody" then "she" involved sleeping with "cocks the size of a viva burrito"
But here's the wonderful thing about us. It's us. You could invite me over, get really wasted and end up sleeping with someone else and id be there in the morning to take you to breakfast.
On my way, five mins. Is the line long? Do you think they will they hold a pumpkin at coat check?
I had so much stripper lotion and body glitter on my glasses I had a hard time driving home.
I felt like a personal hot pocket and all I could taste was cigarettes.
can you take a pic of your glorious tits but not send it just yet? I need motivation to finish this bull shit presentation.
Dude you came into the room last night soak and wet and told me you just took a shit in the shower
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