i'm only drinking out of pineapples from now on.
I forgot how hot balto sounded
This is a drunk text message. I am so glad that we are friends. Tomorrow we will eat sandwiches in miniature. We both love dogs. Flower.
i think i am going to devote my summer to making my cats internet celebrities
This exeeds the amount of high I planned on being.
idk what id do withouhrh yoy btro
i'm not a hellocoptur, but youer in a dorm ans im un a dorm
My brother just woke up to see me on te couch dipping hamburger buns into pizza sauce. I'm beginning to question the life choices that led to this moment.
True life. I have to get a nose job due to a deviated septum from blowing coke. Thank you college.
ARE YOU THINKING VAGINA THEMED RESTAURANT
Also, did you really start discussing the weather in the middle of telling you my sexual fantasy about you?
I found it. now I'm going to the gym to be "healthy" or whatever that folklore is called.
Your ability to eat ass like its your job and yet turn down quinoa because it's "gross" is confusing.
I haven't had a bra on since I quit my job.
I woke up and my pants were in the kitchen but my shoes were next to my bed. Do the math...
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