3.50 mugs at the bar.
Nah man, im with an ugly chick. Im waiting til everyone's drunk enough tonight, they don't notice.
How ugly, and does she have friends?
one day john is going to snap and they are going to make a new show called "john and chainsaw minus 9"
I apparently took a 45 minute shower, and became best friends with his mom.
As we walked into his room, he said welcome to the hurt locker. I should have left, but I love that movie.
seeing two hook-ups in tagged in the same picture will send chills down anyone's spine.
Dude, they are shaking the RV, yell at them. It feels like i'm being rocked to sleep, I don't like it, I'm not a baby.
Why didn't I see you last night!?
We made out like 4 times....I think I saw you.
The Deck is crawling with Cougars. Sound the irresponsibility alarm and come drink with me on a Tuesday night.
Dude. Yeah. This is a game changer. I feel dirty and possibly pregnant and it hasn't happened yet.
How are you not embarrassed to know me. I'm a mess right now. I'm a walking, talking tornado of embarrassment
Let me know. Show me one boob if yes. 2 if no
Is her dick bigger than yours?
Never let your siblings swipe right.
Ok. After that I think I'm going to drag queen jello wrestling if you would care to join.
I’m literally naked drinking a beer and I gotta leave in 6 minutes for work lol
Randomize