That's not ass to mouth..... That a rim job!! Are you telling me she licked your asshole?!
We even fucked WHILE he was making me breakfast in bed.
...She was shooting whiskey using a turkey baster...i was horrified.
And by "got a tattoo" i mean i got a tattoo in the dorm bathrooms with a guy using his cousin's tattoo gun.
It must be illegal for me to be this drunk in front of this many children
I HAVE A PIGEON IN MY JACKET.
I tackled a mailbox like a linebacker. He almost broke his hip and his friend lit a bottle rocket off inside of the car. Yes it was a successful night.
I felt that there wouldn't be enough planB and forgiveness to go around
For thanksgving we are only drinking wild turkey for the next 24hrs time to strap your balls back on and maybe a helmet
Ps we bought 8 pellet guns just now
You took off all your clothes to try on her fur coat and then punched me when I said you couldn't wear it to bed.
The part of "Dave" will now be played by "Rob." Rob, why don't you unzip and show Dave why that is.
No, next time he offers you a ride home, ask him about Batman. The result will always be road head.
Not my fault people bought me shots. waving a shot in my face is like waving a cock in yours
I opened my eyes to the dog snorting coke, I decided it was best to just close my eyes and forget what I saw
Let the healthy eats/juice cleanse begin. Today is day 1
Have you cleansed yourself of the boy yet?
Randomize
