There were 3 chicks in my bed I didn't know when I got home. Now I know all of them. Biblically.
A disheveled girl in front of me just looked down, shrieked, and yelled to the girl next to her "what is this" while pointing at two large white stains near the crotch of her black jeans. I love that Thursdays are weekends, it makes awesome Friday mornings
i seriously just saw a stripper from last weekend walk into the classroom next to me!!
Would we rather be in rehab with the drug addicts or the girls with low self esteem?
we just ordered 30 dollars worth of french fries...whats wrong with us?
Just think, if your stepsister would've gotten knocked up 2 years earlier, she could've had a TV show. What a bitch.
I have no idea how to attract men with my personality anymore. He can't see my tits via facebook chat
Me too. We could do it like prostitutes. No kissing on the mouth.
Just had sex in the darkroom, while a class was going on ten feet away. I finally have a good sex story.
She found the planted magnum condom..once she figured it out it was too late.
I got to my internship late... with a bag of chipotle and sex hair.
I was really hoping my 420 would involve a lot more weed and a lot less buttholes
i tried to break up pigeon sex because one looked too young to consent. fireball feminism ftw
Every morning should start with 2 orgasms and a shoulder massage
You can’t homewreck what the Lord hath brought together.
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