Look at my ENTIRE past
Highly public sexual behavior gross mismanagement of funds socially unaccpetable and radical speech and thought
Might as well have a blog about it at this point
Why are you at a bar in Connecticut?
Long story. One that now involves lots of delicious chicken wings om nom nom
I'm drinking till I'm someone else's problem
my bedside table was not meant to hold this many beer bottles.
5 out of the 6 of them cut their hands while trying to shot gun the beer, I had never seen balls attached to such patheticness
it's like russian roulette but with a penis
Just in case you were wondering I sent you a text at 4:37 in the morning because I woke up on the side of the highway at that time
You need to tell him your pregnant or we need to stop playing doubles beer-pong. My liver is begging you.
You just kept screaming at everyone 'not to break your scarf' and doing somersaults
He's just sitting there staring at my sisters teddy bear hoping it will come to life.
the bruises from climbing out of the window last night make sitting at my desk impossible. legit excuse to not study right?
drinking vodka, listening 2 smh at 530am slow cooking beef stew. you'll enjoy the stew and worry abt me in the morning. bon apatite
Omg last night I was giving shots out like I was the Willy Wonka of the alcohol world.
good news: smoking weed at school again, quality of life has improved drastically
I am so stoned. And there are so many white people in this Jack in the Box.
Randomize
