I've come to the conclusion that as a grad student I would much rather prefer to get laid then get drunk
I think you know full well that a few years ago my stance was the polar opposite
Lets drop out of school and be professionally skinny and drunk
Why are handjobs necessary in class?
it was so cute when you were pretending to have willpower
You said "It's ok guys, I know I'm not really a turtle" and then tried walking on the lake.
Jen's arm is stuck between a wall and her bed. She's naked and needs someone to go help her.
I seriously told a stripper I would hold her hand when she goes to get ass implants.
If she says "This is how acid feels" one more time I'm never trip-sitting them again.
Sorry about coming to the pool in only a thong. I thought you said it was closed. Not that you were teaching a group of kids how to swim.
He was chasing Ciroc shots with sips of Captain Morgan... he didn't make it to midnight
The stock is going waaaaay up on that picture of my pussy with a bowtie on it.
I'll only sleep there if we can bone on your balcony.
So, no matter what happens today, hold on to this. At least you're not naked under your ex husband's trench coat being stopped by the police who also work with your ex husband. Long story. Actually, not a long story. That's it.
So adding to the list of things my boobs can do, sweeping with a broom is apparently a thing.
Can you see if my straightener is in your refrigerator?
Yes. Its here..
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