some dude is getting blown right outside the bar in his car. reeediculous
class
he's dribbling her head like he's fucking allen iverson
I told him I had my daily dose of vitamin c so i wouldn't blow him
Btw, I'm really high so I apologize if anything I say gets translated into arabic.
just walked into the room and her sister said loudly, "do him, or I will."
So, apparently I made everyone omelets last night. Even when I'm drunk, I'm still a trophy wife.
The required reading for this week is a paper about birds called great tits. Let's see my TA keep a straight face through this discussion.
I gained confidence after I found out she was a lesbian. At least that way I could flirt with her and convince her to buy me taco bell after the bar
Please root for the ravens. I now have oral sex riding on this and it's been sooooo long
holy fuck man...it feels like I got beat the fuck out of by death's baseball bat...chimichangas?
My therapist keeps stopping to ask what 'hooking up' means
ITS ORAL SEX CAROL
By early evening I was shouting at the deeply Christian girl to suck my dick inbetween snorting lines of gatorade powder.
I was mad at him...then I jerked off. Now I'm over it. Orgasms fix everything, I swear.
She was on top, but I lost her at "alright, you look like predator."
You are allergic to dogs. DO NOT kidnap something you are allergic to. No matter how fluffy.
No one can explain why there is Dora the Explorer shampoo in my shower...
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