She's got an ass you could write the declaration of independence on in one line. Takes up three bar stools.
this girl with a french braid down the center of her head won't stop talking about the benefits of the free market. i'm hungover, bloated and haven't slept for 4 days. shut up french braid girl, shut up.
you pissed in the sink and didnt realize it until it was time to wash your hands
Question. Will thrown up fruit loops go down the shower drain?
My dealer's mom died on christmas eve. Is it too soon to see if he's holding?
Also yeah I would definitely have to say that one of my favorite things to do is to get high and pet cats.
I have 3 texts in my phone that say "Thanks King Tyler". I think I've successfully drank myself into a monarchy.
I am both excited and frightened by the fact that this much everclear is legal here. Best vacation ever.
it's like his dick is making a u-turn.
I woke up this morning half naked, smelling like an ash tray, with an empty bottle of jack next to me, and now someone named Dora the anal explorer is texting me.
it's ok, no one ever died fom being sticky.
i've gotta research that and get back to you.
I have a knack for carnage and poetic language.
We are horrible
Yeah but we're also awesome
I just made myself orgasm twice and Laura lee hit 4 million subscribers. It’s a good day everywhere
She shit herself again. We're calling her the "Queen of Sharts".
Randomize
