i found her turbo button.....if you know what i mean.
I'm getting drunk watching the disney channel. Is this a main reason why we aren't together anymore?
There was a picture of him proposing on the night stand and their dog watched, but I can't help myself, his dick is just so perfect.
Honestly, your dog is in better hands with that homeless guy.
Apparently riding the dog like its a small horse is frowned upon in this establishment
It's raining beautiful colors and I don't know what the fuck is going on
He is full of southern hospitality and I want to be full of him.
We'll just play it by vagina and see where it leads us
The sex is great, I just think it'd be better if we listened to Deftones during it.
Come help me clean and have sexual intercourse with me
Bring breadsticks
So, I without a doubt haven't used the bag I'm now carrying since we were dating. Just had to discreetly throw out an unopened magnum in a bus station.
So my mom wants to hear about my weekend. How do I make licking cupcake frosting off your face while high not sound like just that?
If I could figure out how to do him with his wranglers on you would never see me again.
You were cussing me out in sign language, and slurring your signs.
That's some kind of record drunk there...
He gave me a back massage while we were fucking.
Did you get that?
WHILE WE WERE FUCKING.
Randomize
