I wannas sexs uuuuu
Lets go to the mall and pick up some fat chicks and take them out tonight so we can be the skinny friends
I thought it was weird that her dad told me to finish and get out after he walked in on us. I like him
fuck. did you have to draw it on me with a permanent marker
Any girl that compares her vag to a hot ham sandwich is beyond a slut
some guy just walked up to the bench i was on, backflipped off of it, gave me his number and walked away....i love this city
I just realized this is gonna be the last time that I'm high in my childhood home. I'm kinda sad. I'm really high..
Dude, she's the greatest salesman alive. she convinced chelsea to buy a box of Cheerios for $20. She can find your dick some willing pussy.
He told me my butthole was like "Narnia" and that it's a wonderful place he would like to visit.
I'm hungover laying in my moms bed watching Space Jam.. Adult Life..
Do you think I'm short enough to dress up in a ghost costume and go trick or treating and have people believe that I'm actually a child?
He could only go see Deadpool without his girl if he was black-out drunk... because spoilers. They're the perfect couple.
OH MY GOD REMEMBER ALL THAT I LOVE NEW YORK I DVRED BECAUSE I JUST DID
It was great. Somehow, sleeping with her sister cured everything!
i think i'm just going to start having sex with his brother, he's much hotter and it would definately be less illegal.
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